Cinnamon roll...

OF DEATH...

It looked so promising, like a beacon dropped from the heavens from angels above. Well not really but it really seemed like a good idea at the time. I decided that I would have one, just one this once. Now usually I stay away from these carts, not because the coffee is awful, cause it is actually pretty good, or the food is gross, cause most of the time it is really good but more because the little men who run them decide that they love me. The way I decide my choice vendors are they are the less creepy ones. This is the main reason why I try to stay away from the coffee cart. He keeps calling me sweetie and guessing things about me... naturally I lie, as of now I am a girl from Brooklyn that is married but don’t wear my ring cause I am suffering from a skin condition on my fingers. Yeah I know I go pretty far with my lying... it should have been a sign that it was harboring a death star from the pits of hell for me. the words "I'll have a large coffee skim 2 splenda and I think I'll take a coffee roll" the angels in heaven started weeping when he said "sure sweetie coffees on me". I should have known... a free coffee although not out of the ordinary from sweetie pie, it just felt off today.

As I stroll into the office I get myself to my desk and set myself up. I start checking emails and getting my day started. I take a bite of the yummyness, and it is good, REALLY good. But I guess that’s how the devil gets you I guess. After it was all gone it took some time to actually show its true self. After I washed my hands and all of a sudden POW it hits me... an uppercut to the stomach. Holy crap I just got punched in the stomach... wait no I didn’t no is here to punch me. Maybe there was a run by punching from a leprechaun that I didn’t see, yes that must have been it, most plausible explanation. So for the next 45 min I had a little crazy leprechaun perpetually punching my stomach as hard as their little gold digging fist could punch. The nausea hit, uggghhhh and then woes of all woes the single bathrooms are LOCKED... yeah thanks, and thanks to my wonderful company we have had the single restrooms locked away for us to stare at them but never be allowed to use them. I can’t even pee in a public restroom unless it is do or die much less vomit in one.... so I do the unthinkable. I hold it in... I apparently have the talent to hold vomit in. another 45 min and I think I may be recovering... there must have been unicorn tears in that chamomile tea that I drank... and there and then I vow to never eat a succubus cinnamon roll again!

I am a master procrastonator

So I have been off of work since Christmas. I had so much to do and a whole week to do it! Oh the potential of having a whole week, endless possibilities of things to do. Well that would have been fine and dandy if I ACTUALLY DID ANYTHING! For some reason I was able to accomplish pretty much nothing while I was off from work. Lets run down the things I was DEFINITELY going to do shall we?

Re-join the gym specifically NYSC so I would be able to go right after work since there are a million of them in the city and one close to my house here. Well nope never made it over there to sign up. I didn't even call the effing place! I am not sure how I managed to be so lazy about even joining a gym. I actually need to really get back to a gym especially one that is so convenient and wanted to wait till around now so I could get a decent break on the price and or contract and what have you. Also my company has some corporate discount with them... I honestly have no reason not to have done it.

Get new tattoo the little elephant, and the ohm... yeah that meant me having to get off the couch to sit in another chair and obviously that was wayyy to much trouble for me. Well actually no, I want to donate blood first cause I wouldn't be able to for a year after but I mean really how much effort would that have taken!? I find a donation point, effing LIE DOWN for half an hour and you get a friggin cookie and juice after. Reallly how is it possible that I couldn't manage that!?

Get hair done... here's another hard one... I apparently couldn't manage driving to a salon, sitting in a chair and letting someone else do all the work... I mean really?! I couldn't manage that!?

The crazy part of the whole thing is I totally know that I am actually being that lazy when stuff like this happens... I am so lazy I couldn't come up with a new years resolution. I mean this is so ridonkulous. That's it here and now I will make my resolution and it will be to not be so intensely lazy! Hopefully due to my resolution I wont be too lazy to not keep with the resolution of not being lazy... ha ha ha